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Having your own car means acting differently around people, determining early on in the relationship who are the people that really want to be your friend and who are the people that want to befriend your car. Having this new attribute adds value to my role as a ‘friend' as owning your own sedan is similar to having a luxury yacht or an island in that for many people, a friend with one is even better than the hassle and maintenance of having one of your own.

The test drive we took was one of those awkward times, similar to the confines of an elevator, when your proximity to a stranger goes on just a little too long. The man Roni was a nice Nicaraguan whose face was pockmarked like a beat up mouse pad. He had this tendency of asking questions and then answering them himself which, beyond making for an easy conversation, was quite entertaining.

“Do you think it's going to rain out later on? Yea, I'd say it's going to rain.

Definitely going to rain” he'd say, the kind of way I'd imagine someone with split personality disorder might, essentially interviewing himself. Other than it being his occupation, it appeared that Roni's life itself was in test mode.

These rhetorical statements were sometimes followed by the kind of question that led me to believe not only was Roni peculiar but he was also doubting my driving.

“You do have your license right?”

When asked about the frequency of car accidents in Panama, Roni responded with this odd, almost philosophical motto about how I was an adult now and if something like that happened I would have to take responsibilities for my actions. I found this to be a very odd segue and beyond really taking it to heart, I found myself trying to think back to the turning point when I actually became an adult and how if at all possible, I could reverse the process. Roni gave me his card at the end, a card I would probably end up using to get the crud out from underneath my fingernails while waiting on slow internet.

Panama has a decent number of quality used vehicles for sale because, in my opinion, its people are obsessed with the latest and the greatest. The people here also appear to take good care of their cars which is helpful when you are in the market for a second-hander.

I went to one used car dealership where the only thing worth noting was that the salesman wore a checkered eye patch. To me, eye patches are far more than an accessory. If you have not spent some time around someone with an eye patch, it almost in a way speaks to you. Eye patches represent something mysterious and enigmatic that, if nothing else, say “I bet you want to know what's going on behind here, don't you?” Losing an eye is far more impressive than losing for example a toe, because usually missing eyeballs are a result of something dangerous and illegal like spear combat or a run-in with a pirate. Anyone can get their finger caught in a drill press but when was the last time you faced a saber to the skull?

“Glee” isn't the right word for what I was feeling about the eye patch, but it's the first that comes to mind.

Another dealership I went to was in a seedier part of town, the kind of place where, if you're lucky, even the man selling you the car may ask you for some spare change. While wandering through the lot, I couldn't help but notice a small, ratty looking man sitting over in the corner wearing a tweety bird T-shirt and seemingly sobbing. Having this deep and upsetting conversation with what I can best describe as a beat-up Snoopy doll. The cars at this place reflected the quality of the grounds crew and half way through the test drive, the engine failed so we took a taxi back to the shop.

I've had good experience using the classified section of Panama newspapers, specifically La Prensa. When you read through the listings—those funny abbreviated stats that people use to try to beat the per-letter pricing system—you can't help but feel like you're looking for a soul mate; someone sporty with 4drs, pwr wndws, and low mileage on the road. If your Spanish isn't too hot, you may want to get a friend to call for you, and perhaps even go with you to test it because there's no more defeating feeling that trying to negotiate with someone speaking in code.

Most of the used car dealerships in Panama City offer small guarantees that will cover the motor and transmission for three to six months. My best experience so far has been at a place called Auto Estilo where “our cars today are yours tomorrow”. That's not actually their motto but it was one that I pitched and one they said they'd take into account. They have lots of high-end cars that they rescue from banks who repossess them from bad owners, meaning so you can snag some pretty good deals. For the most part, the prices seem to be about the same, if not a little less than at home. I find that it helps to bring a few fresh sticks of bubble gum along with you should the haggling get rough, being that no one, not even a used car salesmen, can turn down Juicy Fruit.

I'd also recommend bringing along a lawyer when its time to sign whatever papers are needed. Even if your Spanish is as good as mine—perhaps the best out of anyone I know—it can be helpful to have a local there, translating Spanish words that you may not understand into English words that you still probably won't understand. Most of the used car places will do all the paperwork for you so that makes things easy, and in case you were wondering, you are technically allowed to drive on a foreign license for three months before you are supposed to get a Panamanian one.

Insurance on used cars is not something that I am too knowledgeable about, however, rates vary from about $200-$500 per year. I have found several reliable guys who have this magical way of making the car you want appear...and they do it legally. So if you're in need of a new set o' wheels, let me know and we can meet up. I'll be the guy wearing the eye patch. (Note: After I wrote this article, Auto Estilo went out of business.)

Panama Information

Comments (1)

panajane: Car friends Hahaha, reminds me of that Weezer song, where the girl asks if he is going to the party and she says (and I quote) "Can I like, get a ride?". I think the song is Undone, but I could be wrong (probably am). Speaking of which, ummm, Matt, can I like, get a ride? Hehehe, kidding. http://www.atlyrics.com/w/weezer/page15.html It is Undone! 1 June 17, 2007

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