Elegant Sunglasses

I’ve always liked the idea of arbitrary testing, whether its for athletes using drugs or, in this case, for my small fleet of maids who, while being extremely good, have a tendency to sometimes do a half-ass job.

“Starting today, we will check the apartments at…” and I stopped here, realizing I had no idea how to say the word random in Spanish. These are two things – managing a fleet of maids as well as the struggle to finished a complete sentence – that we don’t normally deal with in the USA.

“We will check the apartments at time periods that are not premeditated.”

My friend Doug asked me if I just used the word premeditated and we laughed because it was the equivalent to a kid who’s never fired a gun hitting the bull’s-eye with an M-16.

Later on that day, I stopped at the HSBC bank on Via Espana, which I like because its generally not too busy and the girls that work there are all suspiciously good looking. Like most banks in Panama, there was a guard outside the front door, but unlike most banks in Panama, this guard was wearing a pair of ridiculous sunglasses: the wide, dark, virtual reality glasses elderly people prefer.  I’ve seen these things worn for 25 years and no one ever says anything: it’s just understood that you may only wear them after you turn 75.

“Your glasses,” I told him. “Very elegant.”

He thanked me modestly, and when I was getting back into my car, I tried to snap a photo of him using my Blackberry but realized, in the process, it might look a little bank-robber-like.

When returning to Casco Viejo, I pass through what I call the Gauntlet of Darkness, which is really no more than a narrow ghetto street with all kinds of interesting characters doing funny things. I like to think of them as actors in a play, that’s how bizarre they seem.

This particular afternoon, I passed by three men, each carrying something amazing. The first had two snappers the size of deflated footballs, one in each hand. The second guy was carrying a giant rusted boat motor over his shoulder. The third wore a bloodied butcher’s apron and carried a fake-looking pig carcass across his chest, the same way you might hold a big wet log. These are three guys I guarantee none of my friends saw driving home in the States.

When I got home, I noticed that 35 people from Nepal looked at my website in the past 24 hours. This was amazing.  

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Wish I was rich
written by Aaron , May 13, 2010

I just turned 31 and am growing weary of this north american lifestyle.
the cost of living in Canada is insane.I decided a few months ago that I needed a major change, and started looking a places to live.
I started doing some research on Panama and now It's all I can think about.How can I move to Panama?It seems like an Impossible dream at the moment,as I understand getting employment as a foreigner is next to impossible.
Looks like I'll have to live my Panamanian life vicariously through you're blog!

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